Every so often, a blog entry writes itself, I merely act as the conduit. Here’s an example.

I’m a staunch Liberal. I identify with the Democrats. I’m fervently anti-Bush. So it will come as no surprise to anyone that I received a letter from Mr. Bush, Speaker of the House J. Dennis Hastert and Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist (M.D.)

…recogniz[ing] the wonderful folks like [me] who are the backbone of our party.

The letter, an invitation to “The President’s Dinner” on June 19, is filled with many such ironic gems. It goes on, for example to honor my “commitment” the Republican cause. Which cause is that? Raping the environment? Eroding civil liberties? Killing innocent civilians?

It gets better.

The invitation wants to

recognize [me] for the role [I] played in electing President Bush and our Republican Congress […] as we head into this critical election season.

Because these elections will be among the most momentous, historic, and crucial of a generation.

There’s so much at stake—our economy, our culture, our children’s future… our freedom.

And if we don’t come together and run the best campaign of our lives, all that we’ve worked for over the last six years will be lost.

The letter exposes the deepest fears of the Republican party. It goes on

[The Democratic Party has] no agenda whatsoever, other than saying they are against everything you and I are trying to accomplish.

Unfortunately, they do have one thing: cash. And lots of it. [Emphasis theirs.]

It appears the Republicans are worried about the cash hordes of the Democrats. This is particularly amusing considering the cost of attending this dinner: $2,500 a person or $25,000 for a table of ten (which includes a photo-op with Mr. Bush. Ooooh.).

Let’s see what else they are worried about.

While we’ve been working to confirm conservative judges,

Anti-government, pro-business judges.

make President Bush’s tax cuts permanent

ensuring the wealthiest Americans receive the massive bulk of those cuts while normal Americans receive almost nothing.

and give our military and intelligence agencies everything they need to win the War on Terror…

Define “win”. Does it include killing all the terrorists? Having them surrender to you?

Define “everything”. Does it include body armor? Full health benefits?

… the Democrats and their allies have been busy raising money and attacking our leaders to bring down our approval ratings.

Oh! So that’s why they’re dropping! It has nothing to do with a poorly managed war, illegal wiretapping and data gathering or repeated indictments of top Republican officials. Nope. It’s the Democrats fault.

What else scares the Republicans?

The Democrats need only SIX seats to take the Senate, and there are exactly FIFTEEN Republican seats up for grabs! (Capitalization and underscores theirs.)

And in the House, we have just a 15-seat majority to defend with everything we’ve got.

They then go on to quote “Non-partisan political expert Charlie Cook”

If … the political environment continues to tilt decidedly in their favor, Democrats have enough candidates … to make a 15-seat pick up possible.

And the point of that quote?

That’s why we need to fight back right now for our values.

[…]

Now is the time for us to remind the American people why they’ve entrusted us with a majority in Congress.

Because you redrew electoral districts in your favor, and used the Department of Homeland Security to bully Democrats who stood up against your jerry-mandering?

Now is the time to stick to our guns and stand up for our principles—cutting taxes,

For the wealthy.

reducing the size and bureaucracy of the federal government,

Because a smaller FEMA will be much more effective in the next disaster.

protecting private property,

Unless it’s needed for “the common good” (perhaps they forgot to tell the Supreme Court about this one?).

defending traditional values

Of a man and a woman able to marry and divorce in a week, but not a 20-year relationship of two men to be legally binding.

and fighting the War on Terror with every tool in our arsenal.

Including the illegal ones like prisoner abuse and spying on law-abiding Americans.

It closes by pleading for my donation. If I can’t make the premiere donation of $2,500, I’m promised a personal note from the President and a “limited-edition, matted photograph” for only $150, and an additional “special collector’s limited-edition Presidential Plate” for only $500.

A deal of a life-time, no doubt.

All that said, I understand, of course, that much of what was written is meant to fire up The Base, so scare tactics are de rigueur.

But besides all of this wonderful rhetoric, I must wonder how bad the Republican mailing list must be to have someone like me on it. I don’t mind, of course: I welcome all the ammunition I can get, and I certainly don’t mind them wasting the few cents needed to send it to me.